Day 3- SDA Appointment day

Well today we woke up in our apartment in Kiev, excited for our apartment at 12 noon. Hunter had a cough during the night, and he must be fighting a little something because we had to wake him up in the morning. Tyler filled our hot pot full of water for our morning cup of coffee(him) and tea(me). The time is about 9:30. I had read on other peoples blogs that the person was late to pick them up for their appointment, and I figured it would be the same for us. Well at 10:00 am we get a call from Nico, saying Yulia was waiting downstairs in her car for us!!! WHAT, 2 HOURS EARLY!!! So we rushed around and got ready, and headed down stairs. We drove through the crazy Kiev streets, most of it familiar since we have explored this part of Kiev a couple times. Than we headed past where we had explored, passing the Kiev Opera House (hint-hint Tyler) and St. Sophias cathedral as well as The big blue and white cathedral of St. Michaels. This looked more to me to be off greek origin than Ukrainian..but what do I know. And we made our way to St. Andrews descent....where we had planned on exploring on one of our expeditions...and there it was the SDA. As soon as we get there we are told to RUN...and followed Yulia as she is running into a side door. We get in there and see 2 American couples and than Serge comes up to us..first time we meet him and asks us if we have the exact names of our children. UHH....Not of the top of my head do I know their first and last RUSSIAN name!! But I had a document for the Italian Embassy with their full names on it, so we were good to go. We walk into to an office, with lots of bookshelves with binders on them. We can tell Serge is well known and liked just by the way the ladies responded to him. They laughed and giggled and we sat there, not knowing what to think. At first the lady could not find their files, but as she was searching one of the binders, I recognized a couple of the kids from the Reece's Rainbow website!!! I think this is the binder that most people dread...yet when I saw it....I was full of hope and love for these children!! She went into another room and finally came in with them. Than there was some sort of problem when they looked at them and Serge went off with his phone and the paper and made a phone call. We have no idea what any of this is about but we just sat there and smiled, no one telling us anything. Finally again he returns, with the papers in hand, opens to a certain page, points to something and they both start laughing again. I have no idea really but what I think happened was that they couldn't find something in the file, but it had been there all along. Than they show us the pictures of Asher and Emma...on paper Igor and Elizaveta. The pictures were different from the ones we got from Reece's Rainbow. I think they are older pics, but Tyler thinks Asher looks bigger. They were beautiful!! We were not allowed to keep them..or trade them as I know others were able to do. But we were allowed to take a picture of them. So we did. Than they asked us to sign something in this little note book, saying that we were declining to be seen any more children. For a brief moment I though " You mean we can get more of them!!!!!???". But we both signed it and they said that was it. I said "That's it?" And Serge responded.."Well what were you hoping for". I figured since everything else has been so difficult, and this is the thing we have been waiting for for so long, this 5 minute appointment is it?? This is not a complaint....but a Praise!!

So then we all walk outside and Serge explains to the other couple how much money they need to pay..and they walk away with Yulia. Then he turns to us and says " You need to pay $8,600 plus $2,000 for the second child for a total of $10,600. WHAT!!!!! We were told by our agency to bring $8,800. He explained to us that these are the costs...period. He than also told us that we should be out of here quickly because we are adopting from 1 of the 2 regions that will waive the 10 day waiting period after the court date. We had already know this and have been praying for this!! But there is a big thing we didn't know...you have to pay $1,500 per child for this waiver!!!!! No one had told us this part, and we were shocked. He also mentioned we would have to pay to expedite their passport, an expense I know to cost $800.00 per child. So we came here thinking we might actually come home with alittle money....to having a good portion of our money for our expenses here gone and adding $4,600 on top of that. I will not lie and say I was not devastated. In fact I panicked!! But when I am weak, God always makes Tyler strong, and he looked at me...and without any sympathy told me to stop freaking out and that God would provided. For a moment I felt like he just didn't understand...but than I realized he is going through the exact same thing I am. This isn't Valeries adoption, but the Kirkland Families adoption. And most importantly God's adoption. It has nothing to do with me!!! I am not sure at what point I will understand this fully, or when this will be the first thought that comes into my head instead of woe is me.

So we waited until our agency opened...they are on the east coast in the states, to talk to them about this problem. I emailed Ludmilla and let her know what was going on. She Skype messaged me back and said to call the financial person. So I did, and she said that Ludmilla was on the phone right now with Serge and we will get this all straighted out. So finally Ludmilla emailed me back. She basically explained that they had already paid that part to Serge including many other things, since our adoption became a special case. When I read the email the first time, I was so irritated and mad that we came all the way here and are being told we need thousands of more dollars that we do not have, and completely mis interpreted the email. Than posted on facebook that agency basically "Didn't care...sucks to be you". Than my sister called and asked what they said and when I read the email again, I saw I had completely misunderstood what she was saying. So to everyone I am sorry for Jumping the gun. I was definitely not quick to listen, slow to anger and slow to respond.

Last night I felt like God was leading me to His word, so I went into the bedroom grabbed my journal and my bible. I felt like God was asking me "What are you thankful for", so I wrote all the things I was thankful for. And than I journaled my anxieties and fear. And than it dawned on me: GOD DOES NOT WANT ME TO FEAR OR BE ANXIOUS...AND ANXIETY IS NOT FROM HIM!!! ....

I will add more...we just got a call the taxi is coming to pick us up to take us to the SDA to get out referrals!! More on our adventure on the next post. Pleas keep praying for us...as the money situation is still as it was, although we do have the support and love from our agency!!